The NFL season is almost upon us, peasants, and thus it’s now time for Adam’s preview (so I can refer you back to this later when it turns out 94% true…)
NFC EAST
Dallas Cowboys
Outlook: Tony Romo enters his 4th season as the Cowboys starting QB and he is now without Terrell Owens (for better or worse). He is now clearly what the offense goes through. Not the punts however, as they must attempt to go through the ridiculously large scoreboard above the playing field.
Player to Watch: Roy Williams. He is now not only the sole player on his team with this name, but he now must fill the void of disgruntled wide receiver so that the Cowboys fall short of the Super Bowl. Talk about big shoes to fill…
Prediction: 10-6
New York Giants
Outlook: The defense is still one of the best units in the league, primarily against the pass. Plus they get Osi Umenyiora back who they lost last year to injuries. The Giants hope that he can fill the GAP that was lingering over in their defense from last year. http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_svT8-TIuo8g/R6fp0CIWpsI/AAAAAAAAACc/U8rzgUur7Fg/s320/Michael+Strahan.jpg
Player to Watch: David Tyree. He made the catch of the year two seasons ago. This year he hopes to do something he didn’t do all of last year: catch a pass.
Prediction: 11-5
Philadelphia Eagles
Outlook: Drafting wide receiver Jeremy Maclin was a smart move in the offseason. Letting Brian Dawkins go and signing Michael Vick? Probably not as smart.
Player to Watch: Kevin Kolb. We know Donovan McNabb is not going to be healthy the whole season, so the interesting to watch here is if Kolb will be pissed that he may be passed on the depth chart by someone as inaccurate as Vick.
Prediction: 11-5
Washington Redskins
Outlook: They did what they usually do in the offseason: shell out the big bucks. This time they gave them to a big guy, Albert Haynesworth. I suppose they want to make sure he can stomp out their division foes. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W5nlEA8BUTQ
Player to Watch: London Fletcher. No reason to really watch London Fletcher this year, I just wanted to segue into this quote… "I couldn't find London on a map if they didn't have the names of the countries. I swear to God. I don't know what nothing is. I know Italy looks like a boot. I learned that. I know London Fletcher. We did a football camp together. So I know him. That's the closest thing I know to London. He's black, so I'm sure he's not from London. I'm sure that's a coincidental name." -Channing Crowder
Prediction: 7-9
AFC EAST
Buffalo Bills
Outlook: Get yo popcorn ready, Bills fans! T.O. only has one year to tear your already mediocre team apart! This should be good!
Player to Watch: Trent Edwards. So, who has to be the most nervous player in the NFL? I’m going with Edwards, as he now has to succeed Romo, McNabb, and Jeff Garcia as quarterbacks who have had to deal with the drama that is caused from #81.
Prediction: 7-9
Miami Dolphins
Outlook: The team that made the Wildcat famous is now looking to repeat as division champs. It won’t be easy as now they have a much harder schedule and face some tough defenses. Defenses that may force Chad Pennington to throw the ball further than 15 yards. Can he do it!?!
Player to Watch: Devone Bess. Bess caught 35 passes in his last 6 games and he is now a starter alongside Ten Ginn Jr. He could be the number one and catching passes from Brady Quinn. But no.
Prediction: 9-7
New England Patriots
Outlook: Tom Brady’s back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Player to Watch: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Prediction: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (13-3)
New York Jets
Outlook: They made numerous splashes in the offseason, including drafting heartthrob Mark Sanchez and importing defensive members of the Baltimore Ravens. Also, Rex Ryan comes over from Baltimore to take over as head coach, or to jump over people like Channing Crowder on the way to fights…
Player to Watch: Thomas Jones. Jones led the AFC in rushing last year. (Take a moment for that to sink in…)
Prediction: 8-8
NFC North
Chicago Bears
Outlook: They picked up the most glaring need on their roster in the offseason by trading the house for moody Jay Cutler. Cutler is the most talented QB the Bears have had since … um… looking… still looking… … check back later… I’ll find someone…
Player to Watch: Adrian Peterson. If you’re in a fantasy league with idiots, look for this guy to get drafted.
Prediction: 9-7
Detroit Lions
Outlook: They haven’t won a game since December. December 07.
Player to Watch: Daunte Culpepper. All Culpepper has to do to be considered successful is to not do this.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vGs1VuT6FEw&feature=related
Prediction: 5-11
Green Bay Packers
Outlook: The Pack looks to make the transition to the 3-4 defense, which suits its speedy yet tough linebackers well, and with the offense looking strong in preseason, it could be a many a chilly winter trips to Lambeau for opposing teams.
Player to Watch: Ryan Grant. Watch to see how he will respond after a slow start to 2008.
Prediction: 11-5
Minnesota Vikings
Outlook: As you may have heard, they upgraded their QB position as well by bringing in Brett Favre.
Player to Watch: Bernard Berrian. I’d be shocked if he wasn’t the happiest man alive when the Favre story broke, and every 1589412 time after. And by the happiest man alive I mean the only happy person. Oh wait... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCZZUPLl5zI&feature=related
Prediction: 9-7
Next up: AFC North, NFC South, AFC South
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