I haven’t written anything for awhile, and I apologize for that. I was busy doing one of the following: (a.) watching tv series’ that I got for Christmas, (b.) celebrating the New Year in Baltimore perhaps a bit too hard, (c.) watching my team painfully back into the playoffs, (d.) applying for way more jobs than I should have, or (e.) writing things for people/companies that aren’t worth my time. So, it’s good to be back at my favorite place to write.
I am eventually going to get an NBA Preview written. I tweeted here and here Christmas day briefly my quick NBA regular season standings, and I’m pleased with how most of them are looking, but will probably fix the west slightly to adjust for key injuries. I know, I shouldn’t be able to do that. Oh well. It’s my blog. It’s pretty much the only thing I can 100% control right now.
Anyway back to football.
Some quick points on this year’s playoff teams:
1. I cannot remember a year before this one where the top teams in the playoffs have had this many obvious flaws/injuries. It won’t be easy to beat the Packers/Saints/Patriots, but it really does not take a genius to game plan for them, does it? Ball control, short passes, run as successfully as possible, don’t go after their one big playmaker on defense, keep their hot QB on the sidelines, and when he is on the field, rush the bejesus out of him because he is most likely going to complete passes anyway. As for the Steelers, these mounting injuries are just awful. If I were a Steelers fan, I’d look at the AFC and go, really? This should be even easier than last year, but now our quarterback is as mobile as a chair without wheels, our running back is gone and now we have a guy who fumbled twice against the Browns, we’re starting some fat guy from row 12 in our offensive line, and our safety can’t play in the first round or he might die. I just don’t see how the Ravens don’t come out of the AFC. More on that next week…
2. I think the Patriots fans should be rooting for the Broncos on Sunday possibly even more than Broncos fans like me should be. Here’s why: The Patriots’ defense is atrocious. Particularly their pass defense. But let’s take a look at the other 5 quarterbacks in the AFC. Joe Flacco (meh), T.J. Yates (with, of course, the threat of Jake Delhomme), Tim Tebow (rolls eyes), Andy Dalton (please…), and then Ben Roethlisberger. If the Broncos were to somehow, someway take out the Steelers… the Patriots’ dreadful secondary would possibly only have to face a rookie and one slightly above average quarterback to reach the Super Bowl.
3. I’m starting to think we actually won’t get the Packers/Saints NFC Championship game that we all (well, I at least) have been pushing for since Week 10. It just seems too obvious. These are the playoffs, remember. This is the same spot where the 7-9 Seahawks beat went #BeastMode all over the Saints last year. The Lions match up horribly against the Saints, so I highly doubt that happens this year, but I have a strange feeling that either the Saints or Packers go down in the divisional round. I hope I’m wrong.
4. The Falcons and Bengals are frauds. I do not understand why people think either team is good. Yet I can already see both of them possibly advancing because the Texans forgot how to win since they got that whole clinch-a-playoff-spot monkey off of their back, and the New York Giants are just as predictable as … hold on, before I make that analogy, I take it back. The Giants aren’t unpredictable at all! Rather, just when you think you have them figured out, they consistently prove you wrong. They always do this! Just when you thought they sucked, boom, Packers game and Cowboys game. Just when you thought they were great, boom, Redskins game. Forget the RomoCoaster, there should be an entire NFC East coaster.
5. I think I speak for every rational Broncos fan when I say, stop teasing me with these Steelers injuries. Stop it. We’re not doing anything right offensively, why would it start now against the #1 ranked defense in the league? It’s like the football gods are trying to make this game close, just to rip my heart out at the end. (Also, scroll down about midway in this Bill Simmons piece, until you get to the email from Brett from Arkansas. I would take that deal in a heartbeat.)
Ok, time for some picks.
I didn’t post my picks on here, but I went 8-8, winning every game after 4:00 except the Steelers and only getting the Packers, Eagles and Bears right in the early games (thanks Jets for that last minute touchdown. I guess since you wrecked your winning season, you had to score that last touchdown to wreck my winning record in week 17.)
I finished the season 130-126 against the spread and a lot better without it.
As for this weekend:
TEXANS over Bengals (+3)
I have little confidence in this one, but I’m using logic. Logic in the fact that Houston beat Cincinnati earlier, with T.J. Yates, at Cincinnati, and now gets to play them in a packed Houston house that hasn’t seen a playoff game I think since that one year the Yao and McGrady were both not injured…at least, at the end of the season.
Houston: 23, Cincinnati: 17
Lions over SAINTS (-10.5)
Here’s the thing about the Lions: They can still score points. I’m not sure who is going to cover Calvin Johnson, but I would still throw him the ball regardless. Also, if the Saints get down 3 at the half like 17-14, and then maybe by 10 midway through the third, the whole building is going to be thinking “not again…not this late game wildcard weekend shit, againnnnn”.
New Orleans: 34, Detroit: 30
GIANTS over Falcons (+3)
I think I'm most confident about this pick. But I'm actually more confident you will see each of the following: a 7-yard completion from Eli to Victor Cruz that goes for 60 more yards after the catch, inflating Eli’s stat line; a series where Matt Ryan only throws to Tony Gonzalez, and then doesn’t throw to him the rest of the game; Michael Turner getting stuffed on third and short, followed by a shot of Mike Smith gritting his teeth, smiling, looking to the sky, and sending in the kicker; and of course the Falcons wide receiver with dreadlocks that isn’t on your fantasy team scoring a touchdown. The Playoffs!
New York: 27, Atlanta: 17
BRONCOS over Steelers (-9)
Here’s the thing: the Steelers have not blown out bad teams on the road, like, all year (except for week 2). And now they are supposed to do it without some of their key players and when their quarterback is going to be scrambling on one good leg, while Jesus is on the other sideline? I see them winning comfortably, but not by nine, if that makes sense.
Pittsburgh: 16, Denver: 9
Happy New Year, everyone!
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